you blow me away.

my heart leapt on 4:00 AM

EH! damn sweet okay, the way that thing happened. omgod, so dreamy... AAAAAAAH. so cute okay awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww (: omgoshhhh ahahahahahahahahaha!(:

should i deactivate my facebook account? hmmmm...

oh! farewell is FINALLY over! sheeeeetzos! yaaaay! :D we have been planning for this like, since idk when?! ahahahah, farewell done, proposal submitted! ;D

speaking of porposal, awwwwwwwwwww EH DAMN SWEEEET EH OMGOD WAHLAO! OMGOD AHAHAHAHAHAHA 3Awesome! :P

andthenagain, dear idk what to say for you. i didnt see you for a longlonglong time :P i think you saw me. YOU ALL SAW ME MAN THROW FACE THROW FACE THROW FACE! O: OMGOD I RAN AWAY IMMEDIATELY I SAW YOULL, I THINK VERY THE OBVIOUS ALREADY. =.=

omgod, it feels so good to have my 2009 back. even if it is for only 6 minutes. :)

this unprecedented emotion is yet to be rediscovered and be recorded. :D

BYTHEWAY, YAY MISS THANG AND MADAM LUM WON! ;D

my heart leapt on 5:58 AM

beatrice and shiling are beside me playing with celest's phone, and sanika and steffi are talking about mr x. hahahaha. kay wait, idkay what theyre talking about. i am in class, alot of 3a are in the comlab doing the survey. ive did it with sanika''s laptop kay, smart right?

my heart leapt on 10:48 PM

seriously, idk what to do with you mansxz. -.-

^$TYjvcx?efsfawerw?tjqotqot3?ltrtptoermtnkiv5kt5iyh????

ahahahahah ignore. +.+

my heart leapt on 5:11 AM

kay i dont really care anymore really.
think as badly as you want of me.

I AMMMMNNNNNNNN NEVER GOING THERE. THAT ZONE IS FORBIDDEN FOR ME. HECK.

HECK, everyone except... nevermind. SHUSH UP. HECK. SHOO GOO AWAY.

HATEHATEHATEHATE MEMORIES.

my heart leapt on 6:32 AM

i KNEW there was something wrong about both of you -.- fine, heck lah heckheckheck. -.- dont care anymore, dont even know why i bother. zzzz. i shall not waste my energy okay? ahahaha better things in life other than rattling ahahahahahahahaha loser me, and i am happy for you, dear granddy sanika! ;D TOP 5! YAY!

THY LIFE ART CHANGTH FROM NOW ON. :D

THE WORLD IS CRAZY, I WANT TO SEND WORLD TO MENTAL HOSPITAL. ESP BOTH OF YOU. AHAHAHAHAHA(:

my heart leapt on 10:15 PM

moody. hahahaha. okay week 4 overawr thank you sososososo much. i didnt know it will come this fast but I AM HAPPY FOR IT. OVER. now, i just needa concentrate on "adder" stuff. haahaha yest was damn epic with steffi, shiling and sanika during english. shiling's damn cuteee uh.

"... to born me" hHAAHAAH, cute siah. was debating with steffi about euthanesia. hahaha(: mtp yest. my parents met madam audra, MR OMAR -.- , mr chen, miss thang and mr ang.

=.= epicity.

ohhhh owl city <3

my heart leapt on 7:21 PM

the time is 9 11 ahahaahahaha. so funny. okay whatever. a very WIERD DAY TODAY. =.=

I AM DEAD TMR, PLS NONONOOOO!

shut up radio! idontwanttohear anything about love. dontwant. shucks. okay one more day and i am a free bird.

oh on a side note,

I LOVE MY ARABIC CLASSMATES! ;D GUYS YOU PEEPS HAVE CHANGED MY LIFE IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER. I AM A BETTER MUSLIM THANKS TO YOU ALL. I LOVE YOU ALL ;D DONT QUIT ARABIC OKAY? I DONT WANT TO BE ALONEEE ):

my heart leapt on 6:11 AM

ya rabbal aalameen!

hahaha, today, i learnt many things. but ill share only some (coz i needa go, really.) only those who have felt hardships in life will turn to islam for guidance. i heard this over the radio. cool uh! :D and, most importantly, ALLAH IS WITH ME! NO MATTER HOW MUCH I SIN! HE IS ACTUALLY LISTENING TO THE WHISPERS OF MY SOUL, MIND AND HEART.

what happened was, i opened the microsoft word and was searching for a file which i had put in alot of effort. and then, I COULDNT FIND IT AT ALL. a document bearing a similar name refused to open. I REFUSED TO GIVE UP MY HOPE IN HIM. i opened the ssearch button and typed in the file's name. SAME NAME WHOCH REFUSED TO OPEN PREVIOUSLY and IT OPENED! I WAS TEARING OKAY! ALLHAMDULLILAH THANK YOU FOR CHOOSING ME AMONG OTHER SELECTED PEOPLE TO GUIDE. THANK YOU SO MUCH. ;D

a busy week ahead, okay maas salaamah! sweet dreams.

YA ALLAH! ;D

my heart leapt on 7:09 AM

copy cat. tsssssk.

my heart leapt on 9:45 PM

ahlaaaaaan! i have been very busy for the past few days, and will be for the following. listen to this:

monday - stay back to discuss about competition
tuesday - o level lc. (good luck to you all!)
wednesday - english oral ):
thursday - competition! O:
friday - meet the parents! D:

what a week 4! ohno, (ohyes!) july is rocketing past like no one's business. soon, it will be ramadhan! yaaaaaaay! i am just concerned about tarawihs lah. nevermind. should manage like before. and the ugly truth that i am a secondary three student has finally agreed to sink in. do i miss 2009 now given the present circumstances? hmmmmm.

doing arabic now. i finally understand idaafa' and i am going to attack maswdar latter. yay me(: i have changed a bit this week hahaha(: DAMN I STILL NEED TO DO THE PROPOSAL.
[hahahah my sister is very late for her performance.]

i think malay dance is damn cool. nisa and jane taught me two words.
lebai perasan -----------------------> ayesha thasneem. :D

bahasa indonesia dan bahasa melayu! BEHASA ARAB! ;D

idontcareanymore. i am fine, shut up.

my heart leapt on 9:31 PM

uh huh, life is so veraciously chequered. keep wanting and disliking intermittently. ): NO, THIS IS FINAL, I AM GONNA BE THE SUBMISSIVE ONE. MAN, those people, who think that they have a life, actually have a damn spastic, emotional and despondent life. FOLLOW THE LIGHT, YOULL KNOW THE FIGHT.

anyways, i heard the Germans are gonna eat Paul the octopus up, haha. And the spainish are gonna protect it. do i hear the bells for world war three? haha, hope not. omgod darn sadistic mansxz.

germny came in third. nevermind. :D i want netherlands to win, but feel that spain will. whoever the winner is, you deserve it. BUT DONT turn WORLD CUP into WORLD WAR.

my heart leapt on 6:29 AM

you are veryveryveryvery strange.
i dont understand- i know youre talking to someone else,
but it also feels like youre complaining about me.
youre are such a very baffling mystery totally- unsolvable. /:

yet, who am i? haha.
i have changed alottt.
i do not expect anything from hopeless people anymore.
hahahaha, life is rattling on, o level oral next tuesday, and i am the first of all OKAY! O:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH :D

okay, life is rattling on , havent i said that already? LOL. ;D my emotions are jiggling , whipping up with new feelings. i feel empty.

thank youuuuuuuuu for everything that youve done for me, ALLAH! ;D
YOU SAVED ME FROM THAT CURSE! I AM WAAAAAAY BETTER OFF, YOU ARE ALL POWERFUL, ALL HEARING, ALL WISE. ;DDDDDD

rabbi-sh shahrilee sadri wa yasirlee wahlul luqadatham mil lisaani yafkahu kawli :D

my heart leapt on 9:06 AM

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! OMGOD HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

school is starting tmr. /:< wo bu yao leh! tsktskkk! ana laa oreed. ana laa ureed an dhahabtu ialal madrasah lianna ...

and you, yes you. i dont know whether to cry for you or knock some sense into you using a frying pan. /: tsktsk. pfffft. rawrrrr. humph. aiyoh. /:

my heart leapt on 1:11 AM

LONDON : Whatcha doing?
MADDIE : OH HI! Actually I-
LONDON: Dont care. :D

HELLO WWHNLAIAA [world which has no life and imagination at all] ! school is starting on monday, and i dont know what to do! hols flew past like this : ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM. the school days better fly past like this : KABAZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.

2010 has changed my life in more than 10 ways. KABAHATCHOOOOOO! /:

my heart leapt on 10:04 PM

why the heck did i have to chance upon you?
why on earth did you have to come into my life?
and then, leave me so alone.
now my heart is searching for you, my mind is outta breathe.
yeah baby, youre the ventilation .

when you left, i have lost a part of me.
i am still hard, hard to believe.
you have knifed me through my soul.
coz baby, we belong together. /:

my heart leapt on 3:46 AM

gotcha all fired up with your napolean complex
see right through lie a bathe in a windex
boy why you so upset with me?

UNIVERSAL STUDIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS FTW. ;D;D;D;D;D;D;D
especially revenge of the mummy. went on it like 5 TIMES CAN ;D damn fun . the high speed roller coaster will plunge into darkness with sudden stopping and droping backwards! hahahaha! all the mummies were like "TRY TO FIND THE BOOK OF LIFE" "DESTROY IMHOTEP'S CURSE" "I WILL SUCK YOUR SOUL ONE DAY". HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA pwned much! :D damn fascinating! sat on the first row for two times. the behind seats are NOT THRILLING AT ALL /: GAGA HAHA! the eyptian temple was soooo O:! if i were to build my dream house, it would that, or something even better with SCARIER rides okay! :D

I WANNA GO BACK! IMHOTEP, HERE I COMEEEEEE ;D

my heart leapt on 3:39 AM

i can feel it burning fiercely in me.
i have never felt this way before.
i need you now. shucks okay.
i can even hear you, and you are hanging in the air.
oh /:

i miss you bloody so much.
you might miss me,
but you have trained me so well to doubt. /:

my heart leapt on 1:47 AM

youre delusional

youre delusional

boy you have lost your mind. /:

I dont care what,

I FREAKING MISS YOU. )':

you have left me alone.

when will you ever come back and hold me in your grips again?

my heart leapt on 1:40 AM

I LIKE THE WAY I CAN'T KEEP MY FOCUS
I WATCH YOU TALK BUT YOU DIDNT NOTICE
I HEAR THE WORDS BUT ALL
I THINK THAT WE SHOULD BE TOGETHER
EVERYTIME YOU SHINE, I'LL SHINE FOR YOU
DONT BE AFRAID TO JUMP THEN FALL
JUMP THEN FALL INTO ME
BABY NEVER GONNA LEAVE YOU.

HELLO i just came back from Soniya's house(: I AM TOTALLY LOVING THE ICE CREAM I ATE. ;DDDDDDD OMGODDD VANILLA ICE CREAM WITH CHOCO TOPPING AND SOME CHOCO RICE(((: I told them that i feel very royal. HAHAH they laughed too! HAHA so Soniya, Aashi, Rachael, Viggy and I discussed about CAAC and farewell. we have almost everything done. we are meeting again this thurs to go buy all the stuff. CANT WAIT. ;DDDDDDDDDDDD i really hope rachael can make it, for it would be fun. HAHAHAHAHA(: Oh yesterday i did cip@UPTLC with sruthi and sunmathi! hahaha damn funny okay!

i was helping out in this PSLE class. HAHAHA there was this group of small boys who earned my affection okay! they were damn cute and playful- BUT NO MATCH FOR ME. HAHA! at first, they had to write their vision, mission and objectives for PSLE. haha i suggested "getting all As".

THEY said " NO! GET ALL Us ( Double meaning: Ungraded + Man U!)" AHAHAHAHAHA!

I also suggested " go into a good secondary school"

they retorted " HAHA NO! STAY BACK IN SCHOOL!"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA THEY also wanted to put MAN U to win FIFA as their objectives. =.O HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA(:

HAHAH their mission was the best ah. " Study hard. Play HARDER".

OMGOD I SWEAR boys below 13 years old are the best laah! ADORABLE BUNCH OF MONYETS! HAHAHA i didnt even scold them! HAHA and they also thought that i have no idea of ANNOYING ORANGE. ;PPPPPP LOSERS! HAHAHA(: SO CUTE.
and so sad, i will miss them terribly. i will miss the CHEALSEA BOYZ ALIAS GASH(:.

oh there was a girl yesterday who kept insisting that she has seen me somewhere. HA!
oh there was another girl who is impossibly in love with jb. I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY.
oh there was a girl who kept making funnyfunny noises. she seemed WAAAAY crazier than me.

i cant believe this, i am still in love with you. if there is one gem in this world that i am after, it would be you. i really need your embrace. faithful . sincere. burning love.

my heart leapt on 2:42 AM

YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE YOUR EYES
IF TEN MILLION FIREFLIES
LIT UP THE WORLD AS I FELL ASLEEP

HAHAHA hellooooo today sth else happened! i opened my email and saw this so called freaky email

ABOUT BLOODY MARY. omgod it follows me whereever i go! then i was in the toilet yesterday. the bucket started moving by itself! then i heard noises of the plates stacked outside and i also heard a bottle fall. when i went outside, there was NOTHING on the floor and no one in the kitchen. i am pretty sure no one entered the kitchen either. hmmmmmph scary much! O:

hahaha i dont care laaaah i think i am going to start making a wish on 11:11 pm everyday though i very well know it wont work. haha but it is very fantasical :DDD

i think 2010 is changing toooo much already. i kinda miss 2009... i miss the old school campus. the present one is too posh that i feel as if i am not going to a secondary school, but attending varsity courses! O: not homely, no nearness. haiyyy ): i miss my sec 2 teachers especially madam lum! D: i really want her, though mr ang is damn good! i miss 2mmers... esp WQ, AR, HR! only 3 2M people in my class okay! damn pathetic. /: [BUT 3A IS DAMN BONDED!]

above all, i miss your presence in school.

i miss seeing you every morning slowly strolling through the playground in that sleepy mood!
i miss staying back and waiting for you on tuesday until 6.
i miss our journey back home.
i miss your old bag.
i miss you, above all.


thank goodness our schools are very near to each other! at least the ppmacs' dates remain the same.

(':

my heart leapt on 5:53 AM

i saw YOUR "grandmother" who came in my dream today in amk hub, when waiting for bus 135. i gave her the death stare. HAHAAHAHAH, anyways, freaky right? she came in my dream... and on live! hahaha.

i have a feeling that my life is getting more and more haunted. first is that sound i mentioned in my earlier posts... then that "lady" whom i saw today. then,

my mum today accused me of calling her a pretender. I DIDNT OKAY. she hears things nowadays, and this isnt the first time. it is either i am stalked by a spirit, or it is one of a sign that she is getting old. HAHAHAHA. ooooooooh to complicate matters a bit, soniya told me of "bloody mary"...

well according to legend, a woman who thought that her baby was killed got angry and mad, that she killed herself infront of a mirror. the mirror in turn absorbed her spirit.. and [ DONT EVER TRY THIS OKAY] in a dark room, if you utter "bloody mary" a few times... she will appear. if you arent fast enough to escape, her hand will reach out to you from the mirror and pinch your face off or kill you!

hmmmmmm went to ppmacs today for some discussion till around 1. hahah oh then i saw ____ .

i saw _____ and for some reason someone kept staring at me. hahahaha LALALALA i dont care lah really.

you make me happy(: you are one in a million.(:
I will always know how i felt that day!
A feeling indescribable to me.
I always knew there was an answer for my prayer(:

my heart leapt on 4:35 AM

I had the wierdest possible, scariest omgod... what a nightmare it was! when i woke up jerkily, the first thing i did was to THANK GOD that whatever i had seen was not happening to me now.

You know, i was in this oversees learning journey to a place which totally looked like singapore. i entered the nightmare when my whole family [till now, i have the slightest idea on what they were doing there. ] was "ordered" to stay in YOUR (host family) house. i was at a loss for words, i really REALLY wanted to get away from YOUR place. then YOU came back from YOUR school and then left immdiately upon hearing that i will be staying in YOUR house. it was abashing when YOU left, coz YOU didnt wanna look at me anymore. I couldnt go back to the school because the host thingy was compulsory. OMGOD. i wanted to scream. yell. shout. burst out crying.

but the only thing that overtook me was, emptiness - no tears. no thoughts.

confusion prevailed. i was dead scared. i ran to my room. i know YOU dint want me to live in YOUR house. i turned around and my parents were doing their own work. I saw YOU after that. SOLEMN. DAAAAAMN. i threw tantrums my parents couldnt fathom (where the heck did my sister go?)

if my mum tried to prick on my conscience by talking about gratitude and something about being a renting a flat to YOUR family, it didnt work. i wept. i was lost; nearly lost my head.

then i woke up gasping for air. then this scene came into my mind: i was in the trenches and got shot when i was trying to save YOUR life.

i swear, if the nightmare was true, i wouldnt give a damn about the host part and i will go away (i also thought of going to London to be a nurse in a hospital for soldiers who got wounded in a war. i know, strange.) HAHA I am in ecstasy!

LALALA the dream nearly illed me okay! anyways, i am bored. i hafta go back to school tmr for some discussion.

and, i 'd rather you be angry at me than being sad.
i'd rather you not know what had happened.

oh i came across this quote whilst reading a book.

" FOR THOSE WHO BELIEVE, NO PROOF IS NEEDED.
FOR THOSE WHO DONT BELIEVE, NO PROOF IS ENOUGH"

so true!

my heart leapt on 5:10 AM

hello i am doing the proposal AHAHAHAHAHA.
fitriah is damn cute, dontcha think so?

my heart leapt on 6:49 AM

Bring along the things you really need and step into the future.
Leave the grief behind, but remember your love and kindness.

FOR THIS LIFE IS SHORT.

my heart leapt on 1:47 AM

I'M JUST LIKE YOU;
YOURE JUST LIKE ME
THERE'S SOMEWHERE ELSE WE'D RATHER BE
SOMEWHERE THAT'S OURS
SOMEWHERE THE DREAMS COME TRUE

YES, I AM A GIRL LIKE YOU(:

Dont say that. please it freaking hurts okay. you will be fine, trust me. i know you feel cheated but, she will soon realize to tresure those while they exist. you mean so much, to her too. dont say that you will be gone, you are gonna do fine. dont let betrayal overcome you. dont let your love be history. noo listen please i really hafta talk to you facetoface now. /:

do be patient. everythinghappens for a reason.

oh btway, i visited Fairytopia last night, and you were there too :D

my heart leapt on 1:39 AM

Don't regret the things you do, for whatever choices you made were the best decisions at that time.

I have been waiting for the damn bloody hell password since 4. OMGOD. where issit? i dont really care anymore, if i am not gonna volunteer in YOG lah seriously... so inorganized! tsktsk!

I am scared, whenever I look at your photo now. Youve grown SO much. I dont want to give you to someone idk. okay, i know i am being selfish but... i<3yousomuchyeah? cant you see? and i dont want you to leave her either. it is just, we three. the trio. :D

i am really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really scared for us. )): come with me please. D:

my heart leapt on 3:56 AM

All my life I've always wanted
To have one day just for me
Nothing to do and for once nowhere I need to be
With no lessons, lords, or lunches
Or to-do list in the way
No one to say when to eat or read or leave or stay
That would be the day

All my life I've always wanted
To have one day for myself
Not waking up with a pile of work on every shelf
And no debt to pay

What would it be like to be, free!

Free to try crazy things
Free from endless IOUs.
Free to fly
Free to sing

Though I know I have so little
My determination's strong
People will gather around the world to hear my song

I close my eyes and feel myself fly a thousand miles away
I could take flight but would it be right
My conscience tells me stay

Duty means doing the things your heart may well regret
But I'll never stop believing
She can never stop my schemes

In my dreams
I'll be free
Someday.

my heart leapt on 6:52 AM

My lady, would you like me to show you around my Golden Pavilion?

It is a place where our dreams come true. I close my eyes and feel myself fly a thousand miles to there. It is a place of never ending mysteries, evil ameliorating everyday to humanity. It is a place where the Desires of Deep Recesses of Minds are not dismissed skeptically as complete insanity. It is a site where the beauty of Art take a bow, where the atmosphere is filled with melody, where dancing never ceases. It is a palace of feast, a school of wishes, an ocean of solace and exceptional truth. It is a forest of determination, a valley of funfair and an Everest of friendship.

It art an academy of bliss for only thou and thee, dear.

My Golden Pavilion exists way beyond what mankind has ever heard or thought of, way behind those stars and the Black Blanket and in The Ether of Rapturous Ballerina!

Come with me, and I will show you the Straight Path.

my heart leapt on 6:51 AM

why the bloody hell does my mum think i am crazy? I SWEAR I HEARD IT TWICE OKAY. sounds of heavy breathing... and i was the only one in my room. maybe there is a Basilisk hidding behind my bed? hahaha i wont be suprised if I am a parselmouth ^.^ hehehehe i have powers! unknown to mankind! soon, i shall unleash my power within... and destroy the world!!!

LOL JK, i was just dreaming ! (:

OMGOD did i tell you that NATASHA AND NABILAH are soooooo cacat? :D

AS MANY TIMES AS I BLINK I'LL THINK OF YOU TONIGHT(:

my heart leapt on 1:37 AM